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Barb Wire
(out
NOW on Video)
By all accounts, the
TV series Baywatch is now broadcast to 1.3 billion people
around the world in 113 different countries; and let's face it,
we all know why we are watching, and to pick up life-saving techniques
it ain't.
Given that this is the case, it's a little surprising that Barb
Wire - a shameless vehicle for Pamela Anderson -has, by all
accounts, not done so well in the USA. Or is it? If you live in
California, all the girls look like Pamela Anderson and 20-year
old versions of Paul Newman are scattered liberally across the sand
flexing their perfectly tanned physiques. Add liberal doses of sun
and what the f%&@ are you doing inside watching some sugar-sweet
TV series? Still ...
Pam fans in the cold wasteland of Northern Europe won't be disappointed
by this SF adaption of the Dark Horse comic - it's certainly pushing
the envelope for a 15 certificate. It opens with a nearly naked
Pammy lap-dancing it up under a hose of water in a strip joint,
presumably to establish exactly why all the men in the cinema are
there (and also presumably giving the ladies who thought this was
a film about putting up wire fences in 19th century Arizona a chance
to pull the ejector seat).
Set during the second American civil war, our Pammy is a bar-owner
cum mercernary, and in between mixing martinis for kids back home
from the front, she picks up bail jumpers and rescues school girls
from white slavers in an urban Mad-Maxed future. Fairly soon though,
the nazi-like bad guys in the civil war are screwing around with
her life, forcing Barb to choose between a life of ease in Paris,
or a firefight on behalf of the democratic rebels. Some choice,
right?
This is a comic-strip actioner painted in comic-strip colours -
plenty of cartridge popping action, bladerunner streets and a hard
kicking Pam wandering about in tight shimmy leathers (or even less).
But if you want a real plot, you'd be better served by checking
out the alternative reality 1930s fascist version of Richard III
currently showing.
I only have one question. Just how the hell do they stay up like
that? (and don't call her babe)
The
latest Barb Wire Books
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